ducks in a row

[dialogue from A Lot Like Love – badly reproduced from memory. im just not as good with dialogue as pple like SL :P]

emily: we will never happen. for one I wouldn’t date a guy who would take on the first girl who comes a-knocking...
oliver: not even when that girl is you?!
emily: PLUS youre not my type. so what are you the dorky kind?
oliver: don’t worry about me and girls. im not looking for a girlfriend anyways...
emily: AND youre gay
oliver: no, I just want to focus on getting my ducks in a line
emily: you mean, in a row
oliver: yah, whatever, in a row
emily: what kinda ducks?
oliver: like get a job, a house, a car…
emily: so what makes you think the girl of your dreams will appear when you’ve got your ducks in a row?
oliver: she will. she will find me, and… ill find her. we’ll both find each other...

and as you might guess, emily & oliver do finally end up tog. yes, it was a sweet show and yes ashton kutcher was totally cute in his nerdy, earnest way. great chemistry with amanda peet who was surprisingly lovable & funny. recommended for first dates, girls nite-outs & stay-home-snuggle-ups :)

that aside, its uncanny how this whole ducks in a row idea has recurred multiple times this week.

see, ive been re-reading josh harris’ boy meets girl (prompted by a conversation with a friend & having a second read reaffirms my own valuation of it as a very worthy book for the Christian single – go get it!), and if you’ve read it before you might remember this section about how a methodical and logical David ALSO strived to get his ‘ducks in a row’ before approaching Claire with the prospect of courtship.

this whole theme of getting ready before entering the next relationship was in line (get it? get it?) with a personal evaluation of myself. as i glance back at my own duckies, its easy to see they arent lining up too straight.

okay so they arent exactly flying in different directions. yet given i have clear expectations of the kind of guy that id like to be with, ive been chided by how expectations of myself have deflated over time. what ive resolved previously to myself & God to pursue have been dulled… and now God’s bringing them back up on the table.

its like God’s saying to me: so you want this great dude with this & that kind of character. great, but... do you match up? how are you preparing to be the godly wife/mother? how are you cultivating servant-heartedness? how have you grown in personal godliness, inward beauty, maturity, wisdom?

realized ive got my work cut out in striving towards being the right person, becoming the kind of wife that this kind of man deserves.

im not saying we’ve got to be ‘perfect’ before God wld lead us into a relationship. neither am i expecting to only commit to a guy when he’s all ‘sorted’. just feel God challenging me to stop looking at what kind of guy he is to be (He's in control afterall) and focus seriously on growing myself, serving Him more wholeheartedly.

of cos, i dont pursue the godly life just so ill find a godly husband. i persist cos its the purpose of my life, its what’s owed to Jesus. it is to an end worthy of all my efforts regardless of whether or not an earthly companion comes by.

so the element of trust too, comes into play - pressing on come what may. a familiar verse comes to mind:

“Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart
And lean not on your own understanding
In ALL your ways acknowledge Him
And He will make your paths straight”

in other words, one's called to...

not fuss, just trust

so! im going to try and get my own ducks in a row :) pray along with me?

help me Jesus to continue to trust You, to acknowledge You as Lord. please grow me, mature me… mold me to be the kind of woman that fears & honours You. Amen!